What is your favorite 'child-raising' strategy?

I bet a parent will agree that you are on a constant lookout for a new strategy with your child. I can name a few problems for you, that you might have strategically solved even without realizing. Well most of these are first-hand experiences from family and friends :)

How do I make her wear her diaper now that she has started to roll on her own? 

• Let me give her a rattle/doll/any toy
• Teach her to point her nose/eyes as she grows older
• Have a Diaper song - ours was "Dappy dappy do do" :) {Dappy= Diaper + Nappy}

What new trick will get him off the TV? 

• How about having the play-time as the next slot
• Power cut drama - works during day time till they figure out that the Mains stills how light blinking
• I time it just before Rajeev returns from work, and in the excitement of seeing her dad she forgets the TV 

What do I do to stop the nail biting habit? 

• Cook up a story to tell the side effects with his/her favorite toy as the central character

Can I get him back from the park after play-time without the usual fuss of rolling on the floor and crying?

• Fix on the time of return before you go to the park
• Make the child more responsible, let him have his own watch and ask him what time it is say 15 minutes before time out 

What new way will make her eat her meals? 

• Small rice balls that she can herself pick and eat
• Name every rice ball/Mountain as being given by family members
• Treasure hunt - add some dates/raisins to the cornflakes and get them busy in finding it as you feed them

Well most of these are for moms with toddlers or early-schoolers. The strategist parent doesn't rest even as the child grows older. 

The way to get a pree-teenager/teenager to stop complaining and have a positive outlook. 

• Talk to them understand what is their real problem, the influence of friends at this age is massive
• Encourage them to take up a hobby, spend time off the devices and in doing something creative

To explain the value of money to a 6 year old when he demands for the weirdest of biscuits he will never put in his mouth only to get a freebie. 

• Tell him how much it costs, what else you could buy with it and why exactly do you think it is a waste of money
• Make them do little chores in the house and earn their pocket money

To each his own. These may not be the things that you approve of for your child, but might have worked for someone else's. Gone are the days when a 'disciplinary act' from the parent was the norm. We probably believe in discussing and reasoning with children, call it parenting with kid gloves if you wish. I believe they learn better this way. No I was not like this from day 1, since our daughter was born. I have had my screaming and disciplinarian drama too. Thanks to my husband, Rajeev, I could do some self-inspection and am still trying to get better at it.

Is there a strategy that has worked the best for you? I would love to hear from you about your favourite. After all learning from each others' experiences is the best way of learning :)

Five bubbling nursery rhymes for your energy packed toddler!

With a bad weather be it rains or the cold your toddler is forced to remain indoors. Not only is this boring and irritating for a 2 year old, it just gets onto their nerves. By evenings I notice her cribbing incessantly about going out or just being grumpy. My chota packet of Glucon-D, yes that is their energy level in the evening, was jumpy beyond control. Now I had to figure a way out of this.

She loves her rhymes and sings it in her own adorable way often adding new words to English Dictionary and skipping the words or lines at will ;) This gave me an idea to look for rhymes that would get her moving. Yes trust me this works. There are a good number of them that actually help them exercise, and make good use of their energy. And guarantees an on-time "go to bed" routine as well :)

#1 Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes: Now this one is a proper aerobic stunt, also for me. I chose to extend the song impromptu also teaching more parts of the body and to keep her moving longer :)

Head, shoulders, knees and toes,
Knees and toes.
Head, shoulders, knees and toes,
Knees and toes.
And eyes, and ears, and mouth,
And nose.
Head, shoulders, knees and toes,
Knees and toes.

#2 Teddy Bear Teddy Bear Turn Around: Teddy Bear being a kids favorite, they would want to do almost everything that Teddy does.

Teddy Bear Teddy Bear Turn Around:
Teddy bear, teddy bear,Turn around.
Teddy bear, teddy bear,Touch the ground.
Teddy bear, teddy bear,Touch your nose.
Teddy bear, teddy bear,Shine your shoes.
Teddy bear, teddy bear, go to school

#3 Roly Poly: This one gets them excited to have their hands to the Roly Poly, we do it the way you do "Jill came tumbling after". Also helps teach them basic words UP, DOWN, IN, OUT...

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
Up, Up, Up

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
Down, Down, Down

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
In, In, In

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
Out, Out, Out

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
Clap, Clap, Clap

Roly Poly, Roly Poly
Hands Behind Your Back.

#4 Five Little Monkeys - With all the jumping or rather bouncing in this one, your LO will soon be hungry :)

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed
One fell off and bumped his head
Mama called the doctor,
And the doctor said
No more monkeys jumping on the bed

Four little monkeys jumping on the bed 
One fell off and bumped his head
Mama called the doctor 
And the doctor said,
No more monkeys jumping on the bed

Three little monkeys jumping on the bed
One fell off and bumped his head
Mama called the doctor 
And the doctor said,
No more monkeys jumping on the bed

Two little monkeys jumping on the bed
One fell off and bumped his head
Mama called the doctor
And the doctor said,
No more monkeys jumping on the bed

One little monkey jumping on the bed
One fell off and bumped his head
Mama called the doctor 
And the doctor said,
Put those monkeys right to bed

#5 Hop a little Jump a little: It may be too early for a 2 year old to jump or hop on their own, but it is fun to see them attempt doing it.

Hop A Little! 
Jump A Little.
One Two Three 

Run A Little.
Skip A Little.
Tap One Knee 

Bend A Little.
Stretch A Little.
Nod Your Head. 

Yawn A Little.
Sleep A Little.
On Your Bed!

Do you have more in your list? I would be very eager to hear from you. Avani may soon get bored of these and my hunt for more "Moving" rhymes is on.

Few tricks to get your toddler to sit in the buggy!

I would be envious of you if your little one sits quietly in the buggy, sleeps well and makes no fuss on the road. This was exactly opposite in our case. My daughter hated sitting in the pram when she was 6 months old and was the same until she was about 20 months old. Every time we had to go out it was the same story, a cry act, shouting show down, squirming out of it...well I had almost given up.

I tried quite a few things, to make the buggy more comfortable for her. Tried a cushion, this worked for exactly 2 outings. Thought the seat may not be so comfortable, added a linking of soft towel on top, again worked exactly for 4 outings. A toy to hold on to ,I started with the little toy dogs and ducks the washable kinds which were easier for me to clean up if they end up on the road. She liked this idea at first, but in a matter of a week or so found throwing them on the road more entertaining. This was more troublesome for me. By the time I would pick the toy, she would have managed to remove her shoes and done the same. There have been countless incidents of sweet passer-by's on the roads and super-markets coming behind me holding her toy or shoe...

Then came a eureka moment when I saw a toddler with a neck pillow happily dozing in his pram. Brought one on my next outing, she liked this one better. It would hold her neck in place as she slept, and I could easily adjust the buggy to the sleep position without waking her up and triggering the tantrum alarm. She soon figured out the air valve and started opening it, that is when I came up with a counter idea to have a cover done for the neck pillow :). So this is one trick up my sleeve now that continues to work.

Second was to let her take a favorite doll on the buggy, something that looked more like a person to her. So Mickey, Candy and Pippi have become regulars on our outings now. With the onset of winter she had a genuine concern about them not wearing skullcaps like her, I had to fix this too by making skullcaps for them:). But she somehow feels more secure or cuddly when these toys sit in the buggy with her.

    

Another trick good to wear up your sleeve is to have some food handy. Be it an easy to eat fruit like banana or a piece of cake, this could distract your little one for a good 15-20 minutes, while you do your quick round of weekly grocery shopping.

The last was the most powerful one that I had to use as a last resort. There were about 2-3 times when she tried the showdown about the buggy, and I just had to bring her back home to give her the strong message that I cannot take her out on my own till she sits in the buggy. This may sound super cruel for a parent to do, but to be honest I have no choice. She refuses to hold my hand, and managing her on the pavement next to a very busy road is next to impossible. And once inside the supermarket, she loves to pull everything, this would mean a whole lot of trouble again. This has helped her understand(or so is my hope :)) that she is allowed to move around, run and play in the park, or in open spaces where it is safe.

As of now the buggy crisis seems to be under control. But once I get her off it, it continues to be a challenge to get her back in on the way back home. Do you have tips for this. Please share. I am really looking forward for advice on this.

Our best toy investment so far $$$

Toys are a part of every child's growing up years - to kill the cliche, today we have an overdose of them, and kids often look maximum once at a given toy. It surprises me that there is this ONLY ONE toy that Avani has continued playing with for the last 6 months, almost every day, sometimes even multiple times in a day. Thus it well deserves a special round of applause.

It is a simple magnetic slate, brought at the spur of the moment, when she was barely 18 months old.

We were still wondering if she would be too small to use it and so on, but then just picked it up as part of regular shopping from a neighborhood mall. Both Rajeev and I hate stereotyping boys with blue and girls with pink, but this was the only color available :(.

Soon after she got her hand at this, she tried hitting the slate with the pen, and we had to show her how to hold and scribble. She took her own time to get used to the toy, but the daily play time was evident right from the first days. Some of her other toys would sadly lie beside her in a pile totally ignored while she continues for several minutes with her scribbling on this little slate.

That is Rajeev and me...

We doddle a few common things for her sun, cat, tree and so on. One day she surprised me by calling out "Amma I have drawn Achucha and Adamma"(that is what she calls her grandparents. It was only a few lines though, but I was beaming looking at it, with pride no less than that of gazing at "Monalisa" at Louvre. She has continued to draw my ear ( an entangled mess of lines covering most of the slate), Rajeev and me, balloon cat, everytime a new pattern with details :). Even with guests in the house, she has been stealing time to go doodle and with her favorite set of people she makes them doodle cats for her :)

Improved doodling skills, Peppa Pig :)

She will get her doodling right with time, but for now her favourite toy has endured all the falls, scribbles and pokes and continues to be her best play-mate :). Our best toy investment so far indeed$$$

and her favourite Poocha (cat)

Distract - the one success mantra to soothe a tantrum throwing toddler

I have argued with my mom multiple times on this topic both when my niece was a toddler and as Avani started throwing her first tantrums. But today I confess, DISTRACT is one success mantra that works almost always fits like a glove to any tantrum problem.

I realize I have become apt at making stories impromptu, from the time Avani comprehends what I am trying to say. So at times when it is tantrum time, you just point to thin air and weave a new story. "...Aah see the spider there. Now where is it trying to go. Is it Incy Wincy Spider?", "Hey look who is coming to meet us? I heard someone ring the bell. Hold on, Avani will quickly dress up and answer the door.",  ..blah blah blah. With time your acting skills may take your spouse by surprise and he too might start looking around for spiders and hearing phantom door bells.

Move them out of the sight of tantrum. Yes it works, out of sight is mostly out of mind. Unless your toddler is in an exceptional mood. Then apply formula 1, after moving away. I read somewhere that being it terrible twos or a sulking teenager this problem will continue to be worked upon for quite some time for parents. But lifting a toddler out of the scene is much easier than moving a teenager for instance, and this should pacify us toddler mommies for now ;)

When it is one of the sheer screaming rounds, try whispering to them for distraction. They stop their act in a jiffy and try to concentrate on what you are saying. You better have an interesting story to tell. And mind you, use this sparingly else this spell tends to lose its charm.

Well there are times when I am just worn out and as they say once the water rises above ones head....at such times I break into a sudden song and dance sequence. Well I reserve this for times when we have no audience lest I scare them away :D. I do all kinds of crazy emu dance, till she giggles and gives in.

I wish I had these in place when during a transit at France airport. It was just Avani and me travelling. I had a face a full 1 hour of nothing but non-stop crying and screaming all coz I did not let her press the lift button. Sigh!

How much ever prepared you may be to face this, there will be times when you just vent out. I do it often, and am trying hard to reduce the frequency till I get over it completely. Find another mechanism for venting out, may-be a quick break, a vent-out-diary to scribble the cause, count to 10, deep breath, whatever suits you. The quick-break technique seems to be helping me, even as short as 10 minutes, just doing what I love - blog :)

Missing Buggy, Bugged toddler, 4 hours of Transit -You can't ask for more!

It is not new discovery that travelling alone with a toddler is not an easy job. So how do you go about it, you take advise from family and friends. Pack less hand-luggage. Keep enough food, toys, change of clothes, diapers, medicines, wet wipes, prescriptions ONLY in your hand-luggage. Wait I thought I could keep it light :( the spare clothes and diapers and snacks and toys...huh!

Right from the time of entering the airport gates the bawling had started, she did not want to sit in the buggy. This went on till we did our check-in, security check and finally after about 1 hour, I let her free at the boarding gate, and she was beginning to enjoy, when they announced that it was time to board the flight. In-spite of repeated requests that I need to get back the buggy at France airport, where I have a 4 hour transit, the Air France ground-staff (at the entrance of the air-bridge) told me to hand the buggy right there and that I can be assured to have it in France.

The whole 9 hour flight was not that great, she barely slept, but the good thing was she slept when they brought food and I gulped it quickly just for energy sake. The air-hostesses were very helpful, they gave her toys, tried to play and entertain her. I managed to take her near their bay to give her some 'on-the-feet time'. So far so good, we landed on time. A zillion thanks to this very helpful mom and daughter fellow passengers, who helped me with the hand-baggage and also with Avani as I was trying to figure out where to collect the buggy from. I got a shock, when I was told that I had handed it over before entering the Flight (to be precise on the air-bridge), and so will get it only at my final destination. The Air France staff assured me that I may get a buggy to use once I get the terminal. This meant walking the huge stretch with ample hand baggage and a toddler who just wanted to run around, after having restricted movement inside the flight. Woow, I knew this was going to fun!

The first hour and half went by smoothly as we sailed from one end of the airport to the other with me moving along the sign 10 steps, Avani moving backwards 5 steps and so on. She would happily find her way between the barricades and walk into restricted areas, and I kept wondering if I would get arrested for trespassing while trying to get her back on track. We tried to figure out the gate so that we could settle down near it, but 2.5 hours to go, so it was still too early. As luck would have it, all the buggies were in use and we had to continue the walk. All the walking had made her hungry so we both munched on some snacks, did a good round of walk and run around the empty set of chairs. All this was making us both tired. I wanted to figure out the gate again, and decided to go check at the counters. This meant taking the lift. She insisted on pressing the button, but I was too tired to have any more play and I refused. OMG what did I do, the tantrum alarm was set on. And she went on with her performance, with renewed energy thanks to the huge audience.

I could feel 3 kinds of eyes staring at me, first probably too young to have kids or those who have no experience with kids adjusting their headphones"Oh come on, I have seen enough crying babies for the day, not one more". The 2nd kind who have just been through this and with young kids themselves trying to tell me "Hold on, this phase will pass as well" and the 3rd who have probably forgotten how bad it was for them with their kids, ""What kind of a mother is she? Why does she not attend to the child?" I was almost in tears. I was trying to talk to her - No she would wail louder, lift her - No she would squirm her way down, give her juice- No, toys- No. There was no end to the tamasha.

I went to the counter tried to seek help with a buggy, I knew that she was sleepy and the buggy was the need of the hour. No help. I told them about the mistake with the check-in of her buggy, and the staff was rude enough to tell me "But that is not my problem". Honestly I would not recommend Air France to anyone travelling with kids next time, not for the in-flight service-they were no doubt at their best, but for the additional ground-staff services like mine.

Finally after about an hour, with just 40 minutes left for my next flight, the gates were announced. I had to take the same stupid lift down and this time I let her press the button. By now she was tired of all the crying and allowed me to carry her. In the next 10 minutes she was fast asleep, and she continued to do so till I boarded the next flight and was a good 1 hour on air. I was more relieved than happy to get her buggy back at Bologna airport and for the first time in the history of her buggy, she agreed to sit on it, while I collected the baggage :). I guess she was trying to make up for what I went through in those 4 hours.

I was relaxed the travel was done with. A word of caution for all mothers travelling alone, keep your hand baggage light as most of the stuff you need can be brought at the airport. 2 diapers may just be sufficient, the just-in-case makes the no of diapers 5-6 for a 12 hour journey. And it is not worth being physically exhausted when you need every drop of energy and calm to handle your toddler alone. Hope none of you go through this transit tantrum :)